Our "Ruthi Girl"

I don't have many moments to actually think these days. And I think that's a good thing. The last several months have been some of the most challenging of my life. When Hudson and I found out we were having twins, we were hit with the same emotions most parents of twins are: excited, scared, anxious, worried, more excitement..and a little more scared. We knew from very early on that we were expecting twins and we also had anxiety about the pregnancy from early on. At my very first ultrasound we were told that twin B may not make it. It was a smaller sac than twin A. At each appointment Twin B continued to grow but continued to be smaller than A. Fast forward a few months when I began to have weekly ultrasounds to monitor growth. Twin B who we now knew was a girl, Ruthi Louise, was still smaller than Sims but it was a growing concern for our doctor. By 34 weeks I was put in the hospital on bed rest to keep a close eye on growth with the plan of taking the twins if the doctors continued to see a slowing in the growth of Ruthi. Just shy of 35 weeks, another ultrasound confirmed that it was time for them to enter the world. 

I had a Csection this time around and everything went as well as you'd hope. Sims came out screaming at 10:05 and Ruthi came out making her dainty noises just a minute later. Both babies were doing incredibly well for arriving unexpectedly 5 weeks early: both ate well, needed no oxygen or other interventions. In fact, Sims went home with us a few days later. Ruthi was a tiny little thing- smaller than predicted on ultrasounds....just 3 lb 7 oz. Her only job, and what kept her in the NICU for another 10 days, was plumping up. She needed to be 4lb...just 4 lbs to come home!! 

The days between bringing Sims home and waiting for Ruthi to grow were super hard. Having a newborn at our house in addition to a 3 year old, recovering from a csection, and driving back and forth to the NICU each day to visit and feed our sweet girl. I didn't have many moments to think- and it was a really good thing! 

Ruthi came home 10 days later and was so happy to be home! 

Just shy of 2 months, Ruthi picked up a cold that progressed into bronchiolitis. Over a period of a couple of days her runny nose and sneezing turned into lots of wheezing and turning purple while eating. We took her to the pediatrician who immediately put her on oxygen and called EMS to take her to Vanderbilt. She spent a couple of days in the ER, trauma room and PICU before becoming stable enough to be moved to a regular room. Ruthi stayed at Vandy for another 5 days until she could successfully be weaned off of oxygen. During her time in the hospital, she didn't gain any weight. She had an IV to keep her hydrated but wasn't able to tolerate eating much due to her respiratory rate being so high. Luckily, shortly after being discharged she picked right back up on feedings and weight gain started increasing again. It was such a blessing that I didn't have time to think and worry 24/7. 

A week after Ruthi came home, we took her in for two month shots. Shots and visit went well...she got an A+ all around. That afternoon, she started having blood in her stool. Turns out blood in stool is a pretty good indication of a food allergy. This persisted for over a month- I began cutting things out of my diet...dairy, soy and then later wheat, eggs, nuts. Still she had blood in her diaper and started refusing to eat. After not eating for nearly two days, we landed back at Vandy. Long story short- Ruthi has a food allergy (s) that really irritated and inflamed her GI tract. She was in so much pain that she had an aversion to eating. My elimination diet wasn't working or wasn't working fast enough so we switched her to a hypoallergenic formula that has MADE a world of a difference. Sign my up to be a spokesperson for Elecare!

The past few months have been nothing short of crazy, busy and nerve wracking. And, I'll tell you...sometimes it's a really good thing that you don't have time to worry. 

Ruthi is doing so well! I'm obviously a bit biased but I think she's the most beautiful baby girl in the world. And she's one heck of a strong girl! We are so very grateful and blessed and I thank the good Lord every day that our twin B hung in there! 

Give Me Faith

Last week Hudson, Wilson and I went to South Carolina for the week. We enjoyed being away for a little while to catch our breath. We even got to have some extended alone time in Asheville while Wilson stayed with my parents. We lost our minds for a split second and thought we had spare money to spend on the Grove Park Inn...but it was totally worth it!

Hudson and I talked on our car ride back and agreed that our favorite part of the week wasn't the fancy dinner at the Grove Park or even the awesome breakfast at Tupelo Honey Cafe but instead our Thursday night dinner in Spartanburg before heading back to Nashville the next morning.

Hudson and I got to have dinner with some of his siblings and their spouses sans kids. I believe that might have been a first since everyone started having kids. Typically our interactions are scattered and very staccato whilst the 10 grandkids weave in-between us and crawl over us with their eye on the awesome toys at Ammi and Baba's house. We love those exchanges, too but it was so nice to have extended conversations and really feel like we had some quality time.

We were exchanging stories about what mornings look like at our individual houses. Hudson is a solo parent in the morning with me leaving at 6:30 to head to school. Hudson is great at many, many things but not great with food preparation- so breakfast is pretty comical during the week: fruit, cinnamon toast and a Big Bird granola bar (no other will work). But it gets the job done and I'm thankful for that! It looks quite different at Hudson's brother Kam's house- his wife, Emily, is a machine in the morning with basically her own restaurant in business complete with eggs, smoothies, pancakes and waffles.

We talked about how sometimes mornings are the hardest, yet most important part of the day. Mornings seem to set the stage for how the rest of the day will go. If kids are grumpy, it can change your outlook of the day really quickly. Whether you're corralling a wanna-be independent 2 year old out the door on your own or cooking a ginormous breakfast for 3 ravenous boys, or trying to get 2 girls dressed with the right outfit on (the Lord knew I wasn't ready for a girl- not sure I'm made for that)...mornings can be tough.

Since we've been back in town, I've tried to start my morning off in a more intentional way. A year or so ago, Hudson introduced me to a song by Elevation Worship called "Give Me Faith." It has some great lyrics to it and for me has been a great intro to the day. I listen to it every morning as I drive to school. It's been awesome this past week with the combination of these lyrics and the amazing sunrises we've had.

Here are some of the lyrics:

Give me faith to trust what You say
That You're good, and Your love is great.


And one of those awesome sunrises:

All is Well

All is well, all is well.

Today was an incredibly busy day. It was one of those days where you end the day with a headache. Not because of a lack of caffeine (which is typical for me) or stress induced but just because it was a jam packed day.

After a full day of school (one of two in the past two weeks I might add), Hudson dropped Wilson off with me on his way to a church meeting. Wilson and I went to the middle school basketball championship games hosted by the middle school where I teach. Imagine the energy of Wilson on any given day and multiply that by the noise and excitement you experience at a sporting event: it was wild! We ate pizza, sour patch kids, drank gatorade...and chocolate milk, found a pencil and paper to draw pictures, ate Doritos, found other kids to play with, had a lesson in sharing, changed a stinky diaper in the locker room, clapped for the cheerleaders, showed several people our belly button (Wilson's, not mine) and plenty more as if that doesn't already sound exhausting enough. But best of all we got to sit in the stands and help cheer on both the boys and girls teams to victory! Go BMS!

Hudson was able to meet back up with us at the end of the boys game. From there, the three of us went to a birthday party for a wonderful member of our church. We were joined by at least 50 others who were excited to be together for this special event. We enjoyed meaningful conversations, spectacular food and great company.

On my drive home, I couldn't get the song "All is Well" out of my head. I couldn't help but think: really, All is Well. Hudson and I are so very blessed. We are both surrounded everyday by awesome and amazing people. I often take this for granted and don't spend enough time pondering how this greatly affects my life...how great of a luxury this is. It's so easy to focus on my frustrations and petty concerns and neglect to appreciate the small things. Really....all is well.

All is well, all is well. Let there be peace on Earth.



And then there's this kid...

Learning to Embrace the Chaos

Our good friend and pastor, Chris Adams, preached a great sermon this morning. It was a message that seems pertinent to us all right now. One of the things he talked about was how the fall is always a time that our lives begin to be chaotic again. The lull of summer is fading away. Our vacation is over and our feet are no longer in the sand. School is starting back, new projects are beginning at work, football season is kicking off (this fills up the calendar at our house due to a certain male who loves football more than sweet tea)...so many things are going on..too many things.

This was especially a great message for me this morning. I'm a newbie to working and being a mother. Never have I worked a full time job and been a mother at the same time. Don't get me wrong, being a stay at home mom is not a walk in the park and definitely has it's own chaos, but working and having a child is a different kind of chaos.

I'm learning how to get home from work, unpack the diaper bag, prepare dinner for everyone, pack lunches for the next day, remind myself what I still need to turn into the daycare (a sheet, a blanket, diapers, tuition), play outside, play inside, figure out what I'm wearing to work, give Wilson a bath, get him in bed, spend time with Hudson, go to bed and then do it all over again. It's so. FAST. PACE.

I feel like my life is so busy and chaotic and fast pace and before I know it the day is over and it's one more day to mark off the calendar. I feel like I blink and Wilson is taller, or saying a new word, or doing a new "trick" that's hilarious.

Sitting in church this morning and listening to Chris's message about chaos got me thinking about how important it is and will be to learn to embrace the chaos. There's not much I can do to make our lives less chaotic. The diaper bag always has to be packed, we have to eat everyday, lunches still need to be packed...there isn't anything I can do to change that. BUT, I can learn to embrace the chaos.

There is an Office episode that I absolutely love- it's probably my favorite moment in television history. It's the episode where Jim and Pam get married. Jim and Pam have been looking forward to their wedding day FOREVER. They want to enjoy it in every way possible. But, the day begins to get away from them and they realize that instead of it being a day of celebration for their future as husband and wife, it's become a day of meeting everyone else's needs: Michael doesn't have a hotel room, Dwight becomes interested in one of Pam's friends, Kevin is wearing kleenex boxes as shoes. Prior to the ceremony, Pam accidentally tears her veil and tearfully phones Jim. They meet in private, where Pam expresses her regret over their choice to invite their families and the office staff. Pam is visibly uplifted when Jim cuts off his tie in an effort to console her. Jim and Pam pause and reflect before their ceremony and come up with a brilliant idea to take mental pictures of those special moments that you never want to forget so they will always remember them. It's just precious. 

So, no...I can't change the chaos in my life but I can take more time to pause and reflect on how awesome my chaos is. Instead of rushing to get through dinner so I can get on to the next thing, I need to pause and take a mental picture of Wilson with his yogurt all over his face, Tupelo's face, the floor, the wall and enjoy him in that moment. Instead of hoping Wilson goes to bed earlier that night, I should pause and take a mental picture because he's not always going to want to spend time with his mother in the evening. Instead of watching the clock and waiting for school to be over, I need to pause and take a mental picture of how awesome the camaraderie is of the teachers  I work with. Instead of watching the clock and waiting for school to be over, I need to pause and realize that I may never have the opportunity to work with these exact students again.

I'm learning to embrace the chaos. Because before I know it the year will be over, Wilson will be older, there will be another Super Bowl champion, summer will be here and then over and I'll have another year of chaos to embrace.

That yogurt I was referring to...

I am NOT in control!

There....I said it. I am not in control. I'm not sure that you can ever really come to terms with that phrase, but (I think) it is in fact true. We are not in control.

How frustrating is that? I mean, really. Who doesn't want control of their own life? Every aspect...who you will marry, what job you'll hold, where you'll live, how much money you'll make, the weather, who wins the World Cup (sorry USA! good try!) and the one that is absolutely driving me up the wall...how many children you will have.

It's a situation that no one wants to find themselves in. Here is how this has always played out in my head: you get married, spend a few years as a couple getting to know each other and becoming financially stable and then you begin planning for a family. It may take a few months or so but then BAMMM you get pregnant. That is how it works for a lot of people, but I have also found that that is NOT how it works for just as many people...including us.

Hudson and I were fortunate and blessed to be able to have Wilson after several fertility treatments. What a huge blessing he is to our life! Wilson has far more energy than any one else I've ever met (next to his father, that is), he's a ham (like every other Neely), he's an adventurer, loves him some milk and loves, loves, loves his momma!

As much as I would like to have complete control over the timing, I'm beginning (and only just beginning) to understand that growing our family may not happen in my timing and that I have little control.

Our prayer is for peace, perfect timing and lots of fun with our precious boy!

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

Summer used to be my favorite season of the year. I looked forward to hot days, bright sunshine and no school for a few months! But as I've gotten older, I've become more drawn to fall and winter. I love the leaves changing and cool days. I love being able to wrap up in a blanket and watch a good Christmas movie (but of course not until AFTER Thanksgiving if you're married to Hudson.) And I LOVE getting all bundled up and heading out to go Christmas shopping or out for a good dinner.

Hudson's parents have always loved building fires during the fall and winter. Even when it's 60+ degrees outside, they have a fire going. They have even said there are times when they turn on the AC just to have one. I love it! Since Hudson and I moved a few months ago, we get to enjoy fires in our own home. The very first day it got remotely cold this year, I had Hudson build us a fire! Looking forward to many fire nights.

This winter will be even more special to us. We'll get to celebrate Christmas with our baby boy! He's in to everything now, so I imagine having a Christmas tree in the living room will be a real adventure! Wilson loves pulling things apart and ripping up paper- good practice for unwrapping gifts.

My parents are coming to Nashville next week to celebrate Thanksgiving- can't wait to begin the holiday festivities!

Happy Holiday season to you!

Wilson (9 months)

The "Like" Button

Have you ever felt like you "like" too many pictures or statuses (stati?) on Facebook or Instagram? Have you ever wondered what it even means to "like?" 

I am one of many moms who posts way too many pictures of their child(ren). I've mentioned before that I never understood why moms did that until I had a baby myself. Now, it makes total sense. Everyday there is a new smile, new skill or some days the exact same thing he did a trillion times the day before but it's just as cute. As a mom, I'm proud of all of these moments and I can't help but brag at how adorable he is by sharing these trillion of pictures with all of you! 

I've discovered that the "like" button in the parenting world is a way to say to other parents "Hey, good job raising that youngin'...keep it up!" I see pictures of friends kids and can totally relate to those moments....

Picture of a baby smiling- "LIKE"...mine did that last week.

Picture of a baby crawling- "LIKE"...we're still working on it, but getting there!

Picture of a baby after shots- "LIKE"...I feel your pain!

Picture of another baby with a helmet- "LIKE"...we aren't the only ones!

You see, I'm a fan of the "LIKE" button. What a great way to encourage each other along the way!

Another Wilson picture: